follow the Leader

Lately I've been feeling very content with my life as a single woman seeking God's heart. I like that I am free to do what I want... meaning that my plans are my plans and I don't really have to consider anyone else. I like that I can have as much or as little alone time as I please. I like not having to talk on the phone at all, or text anyone if I don't want to. I like staying away from my computer for an entire two days and not worrying about if I'm missing anything. I like being able to tell people I'm unattached. I like not having to worry about looking good for someone. I like almost everything about this. Sure, it would be fun and all, but right now I'm so in love with God that it doesn't matter to me. I look around and see so many happy couples... and then I look closer and see so much work, so much hurt, so much sacrifice...I don't think I'm ready for any of that.
We had Godfathers for supper the other night there were like 3 younger couples in there, two that were probably just dating and one that had like three kids, but couldn't have been more than 5 years older than me. I watched these couples, one of them, probably in high school, looked just so love-struck they hardly talked to each other, just giggled and looked at each other... it was cute at first, then it was just like... blah! haha, they were so... happy that it was almost fake. The second couple had probably been dating for a while and they seemed to carry on a long conversation but didn't look at each other much and the guy hardly smiled.
The third couple...with the kids, looked COMPLETELY unhappy... the children were adorable, they sat quietly...giggled once in a while... and seemed to be very polite. But, no matter what happened the mom would bark some kind of orders, her eyebrows were almost touching because she had them pinched together so tightly, and her husband or whatever just sat there and took it all and did whatever she told him to do.
While I looked around I realized my life is great. I know it's worth the challenge and tough times to be with someone, but right now I'm so happy to have my focus in one place and not have to divide it up.
I'm working toward knowing God better, and praying that my future husband is doing the same thing. I can't wait to meet Him someday on our journeys, but until then I'm going to keep heading this direction and learn as much as I can.
God's got a plan and I'm trying my best not to get in the way!